There's always next year.
Hopefully, there won't be. Von Biedermeier next year.
[laughing]
We're going to talk about. what you just said later.
Come on, open her up.
Aw, Millicent, you're. even more anxious than I am.
Relax. I need the box.
I have to make. a diorama for school.
I'm going to set up a video call. with an animal shelter in Japan.
Trying to get him to donate. a bunch of puppies to Kevin.
Millicent's here to translate.
You speak Japanese?
[Japanese]
Well, I didn't understand. any of that.
Do you speak Japanese or not?
You know, my mom played Kenny G. to me in the womb.
She read that playing. smooth jazz to a baby in uterus
was supposed to make them. come out gifted.
Huh.
With what?. The gift of being lame?
Cut it out.. Be nice to Pearl.
'Cause she's my. perfect little cupcake.
You're my perfect. little jelly bean.
-We're the worst.. - The worst.
Yeah. You really do suck.
Paul said the producers love. my child Internet star angle.
They know you're not. a child now, right?
Anyway, my partner and I. just have to make an intro video
and then go to an audition. challenge tomorrow.
Listen, I know I'm the. obvious choice...
For a race?
I've seen you get carsick. in an elevator.
That elevator went faster. than normal elevators.
But tomorrow is Model UN. and Millicent needs me.
I'm the Gayle to her Oprah.
Oh yeah, Millicent,
are you going to beat your. nemesis, Henry von Biedermeier?
He's won the Golden Gavel. four years running.
But this year. that gavel is mine.
I can taste it.
It's metallic, like blood.
Did you see?
There's a new episode. of my favorite show.
No. Don't tell me,. Wes and Bo made a new one.
Okay, I won't tell you.
Showing hurts more.
I can't commit.
All because of Carly.
The Ice Queen.
Ice Queen.
I'd expect that. from Bo, but Wes?
He's become such a douche,
he makes Chet Hanks. look like Tom Hanks.
And they're having people. to mail ice to the ice queen.
It makes no sense. It melts.
We just end up with wet boxes.
Well, it's official.
The Internet hates me.
This is where you guys go.
No, no.
Don't tell me what to do.
Now remember, when we see Byron,. just like we practiced.
Gee, lady, Thanks for. opening my perspective.
You're at an 11.. I need ya at a six.
Hello, child.
Bae I be of assistance?
Byron, hi!
I was just helping this. young person realize the
importance of. not being so focused
on the doll's occupations.
Gee, lady. Thanks for. opening my perspective.
Oh, run along, random youth.
That was a three,. and you know it.
Yeah, you better go.
Finding a parking. spot in Seattle,
is like finding a quiet Aries.
So true.
Don't even get me started. on how an Aries gets gas.
Okay, I'll see you guys later.
Bye girl.
Total Aquarius move.
Not that he would know.
Yeah, not that he would know.
Agreeing with Millicent. makes me feel young,
Pearl loves astrology
and I wanna be able. to talk to her about it.
Ooh, Let me see. your birth chart.
It's like the old saying,
teach a man to fish. and he'll catch a Pisces.
Ooh girl,. let me catch a breath.
That is fully hilarious. for those in the know.
Do you wanna see. my new sticker?
Shh. Reading.
Hey Olive, your mom's here.
Finally!
I mean... aw, already?
But we didn't check. the oil and bond futures yet.
Let's save some fun. for next time.
Bye.
Do you ever feel. like you're more
sophisticated than your friends?
Of course you do.. You're friends with Carly.
So, I made a list
of all the reasons to. run the Groovy Smoothie
and all the reasons. to run the Kevin App.
Okay, under restaurant,. I've got, run my own business.
more keys, potentially to become. a front for the Russian mob,
and install a bidet,. but only for VIPs.
And under Kevin App, I've got,. I won't let Freddie down.
Well, if you're going. with the longest list,
I think it's clear.
If you're going with the. dumbest list, it's also clear.
Guess who found. the coolest Fedora?
Or I can save that story. for when whatever this is,
blows over.
We know how much you like Pearl,
but we thought it would help. to get the whole picture.
We've done a deep dive on Pearl.
And trust me, the world. does not seem to be her oyster.
I have it on good authority
that she claps. when the plane lands.
She orders ice cream in a cone,. then asks for a cup.
Okay, Princess Diana.
And I've seen her eat a. banana without peeling it first.
Oh, so you're not. just bullying Pearl,
you're spying on her, too?
Peel and all. Is it even ripe?
I gotta go polish your old. fencing trophies.
That always helps me. blow off steam.
Millicent, now that. my app's taken off,
your old dad has a little. extra lettuce and his crisper.
I think it's time. we look for a new place.
I do not think so.
Good talk, though.
That's why,. in the spirit of world peace,
we are pleased to compromise
with the Kingdom of Norway.
Do you mind if I make some edits. to the speech you wrote?
Yeah.
I just want you to get along. better with your classmates
and for your teacher. to stop calling me
to say she's afraid of you.
She carries a squirrel. around on the weekend
so people will talk to her.
So, maybe we don't. take her advice.
Can you just try for me?
Sure. I can try to. dial down my intensity
because it's. intimidating to losers.
I'm not asking you to do that.
I am just asking you
to make your Model UN. speech less hostile.
That's literally. what I just said.
Wow, Granddad Shay.
That was a really. interesting coin presentation.
Thank you, young lady.
I guess you could say. I'm a coinfluencer.
You're a real pointent creator.
Look at that!
We both coin. new phrases.
And that's it for our first. episode of My Two Cents.
Pointent creator?
Not my proudest moment,
but he pays me $20 every time. I laugh at one of his jokes
And say what you will, Grandad
brought a ton of viewers. to your live stream.
Way more than you usually get.
You filmed that. on my live stream?
What happened. to my plant cam?
Turns out there was. a change of plants.
Good evening, fine sir.
Before I seat you,. may I take your coat
of which you're not wearing?
If it's okay,. I'll just walk around.
I ate before I came.
Good call.. Wish I had done the same.
They served us tomatoes,. in this weather.
Where are we? Portugal?
Hey, bestay!
Um...
hey, Melissa.
Now's not a good time.
We're actually about. to go to dinner.
Hey, little mama. I'm Carter.
I met your mother, Carter.. I'm Harper's bestie.
Wait, you guys are best friends?
Cool. So, are you really. young or really short?
No judgment either way.
So, we're gonna go.
But you can stay. as long as you like.
Hold up. I got some. questions for this one.
Where were you born?. What's your credit score?
I should go.
I think you need to put. your bestie in time out.
Wait. You have such great bone. structure, please.
His loss, bestie.
When I grow up,. I wanna turn a profit...
by turning heads.
Yep. Great.
I need this monster in my life.
Alright. Change of plans.. This guy is an art critic.
So, he is about to have the. worst dining experience ever.
Please do me the honor
of having an awful meal.
So, just continue on as we were.
I feel terrible that I made. Millicent tone it down.
Millicent.
That speech. was deliciously asinine.
Glad Miss Cox passed along. the message from my mother
that you should tone it down.
Dad?
Destroy Gavel Meyer.
Oh Henry.
Quick, FYI. I'm out. on your resolution,
and I am introducing one. to censor Norway instead.
You can't do that.
What are you going to do?
They're smoked salmon on me.
Sump a bottle. of Voss water on my head.
Yeah, that's right.. My dad researched
all of Norway's top exports and. they're pathetic. Just like you.
Yes!
Dragon Mama.
Solie,
I thought you had that early. morning flight to Luxembourg.
He has some unfinished business.
He always does.
Hey, can you get us. some Popsicles?
Yeah, but there's only. one grape one left.
And you know, Spencer. is going to be...
[screaming]
And now his business. is finished.
